You can't have everything. Where would you put it?
A lot of people are afraid of heights. Not me, I'm afraid of widths.
If you were going to shoot a mime, would you use a silencer?
I planted some bird seed. A bird came up. Now I don't know what to feed it.
Sponges grow in the ocean. That just kills me. I wonder how much deeper the
ocean would be if that didn't happen.
I put instant coffee in a microwave oven and almost went back in time.
If a word in the dictionary were mispelled, how would we know?
I wrote a song, but I can't read music so I don't know what it it. Every once
in a while I'll be listening to the radio and I say, "I think I might have
written that."
There's a fine line between fishing and standing on the shore looking like an
idiot.